I Am Not A Quiter

I am not a quitter. 
Chronic pain and illness is not the boss of my life. 
I am not a victim of illness, but a warrior that keeps trying to live. 
No matter what anyone says to me….family, foe, friends or doctors
...I am not giving up on me. 
I am a fighter. I keep trying and my faith is strong in my Abba. 
He makes the choices over my life. He refreshes me, comforts me, gives me strength and rest, He ministers to me and sends Angels to help me, He is the boss of Life and death. Those things belong to Him and Him only. In my weakness, He is my strength. In my sorrow, He captures my tears in precious jars, comforts me and gives me joy instead. He lifts my head. Whispers to my heart and sings songs over me. 
He keeps my mind and spirit safe and sound. My body may waste away, but my spirit is renewed day by day. When feel like my body is too much to bear with it’s pains, and symptoms fading away, and it all feels, seemingly unbearable, I cry out To Him. I He is my constant companion and friend. When my legs fail me and I am unable to move my body, He ministers to my spirit and gives me the help I truly need. I have not gave up on myself. Everydayis a gift. He is in my every moment. 
I have my Abba and I have Everything I need in Him. So what if I need a cane and and a wheeled rollator to stable me. 
So what if others need to be more patient with me. So what if it takes me an hour to do something that took me 10 minutes to do before. So what that I am forgetful and can't remember words for things. So what that I repeat myself 5 times, because I can't remember I told you, or can’t comprehend your words to me because of brain trauma, and flares of symptoms in my body. 
So what about many things I can't do any more...I Praise God for all the things I can do and for always trying. I'm not a quitter. 
I just need a little more compassion and mercy, grace from others. I really need  patience and kindness. Soft words spoken. 
I really need love in their actions toward me. Those things matter. Consider the sick and those who do things slower. They are suffering in silent screams with a courageous heart. With trust and faith. 
I am not giving up. 
Love always, Kimberly Wenrich 
Edited October 1, 2023

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